S. Olyschlager

She was going to be 29. Oh how time flies from the days when she thought she’d be so much farther ahead than this day. What is wrong with me she’d say; when she’s single, at home and with very little pay. 

I can’t get out of here, but what out there would make this feeling go away? She goes through the list of things she could have or places she could be but what about those things, would actually set me free?  The pain of our world all lives inside her, as she realizes true freedom takes a lot to acquire. 

She’s going to be 29 this year. Oh what a thrill, to make it so far in this world, but her world feels like it’s still standing still. Stuck in time, stuck in the ways that my parents were raised, and the generations before that, I still feel their pain. Living in this society with so much to gain. But what’s the gain worth when we lose our ways. We become alone and disconnected from it all, when life itself, is supposed to involve it all.

Involve the hurt, involve the pain, involve the love that we stow away. Saving it for a special occasion when this breath alone should be enough for a celebration.

I’m going to be 29 and I feel my life has just begun, it always has and I feel it always will be this way. Now i’m thinking about what I can do today to spread myself over all the things I know, will one day go away. My family, my friends, the activities I enjoy, the path I feel called down – I will chase forever, until my remaining days.

Im going to be 29 and I finally feel ok.

My path is my path. It doesn’t matter what you have or what you don’t, what matters is who you are when you don’t think it matters the most. Who you are is the final piece of your puzzle and I hope no matter where you go or what you have, you will always feel whole.