S. Olyschlager

I miss those days.

I see high schoolers in the library, being close, clearly a “couple” of some sort and it puts me into that place again. They are just being themselves with themselves. They joke, they play and they are interested in one another as they do this growing-up thing together.

I remember having one of those persons in my younger days. They were a comfort to me when life was not. I remember some of the firsts we shared together. I was young and I was curious. We both were. I remember feeling each other’s hearts race next to each other as we stepped into unknown territory for the first time.

Something as innocent as holding hands in the movie theatre; who would make the move first? Then what? The anticipation was electrifying now that I look back.

Learning as we go is all we do. We learn what once was a magical thing becomes what happens when two people don’t see a life together anymore. The curiosity and the alone times were special but not enough. The time shared remains in the mind as a new guide to direct us right.

I am thankful for all the loves I’ve had. Even the ones I wanted all for myself, alone, between 4 walls with just us together. I realize I was unable to handle the outside reality as a pair, after he realized it first and broke my first heart.

Those exciting days of dating and being dated. It seemed more thrilling than it does today? but I sit here in the library, still seeing the younger ones experiencing the same things I did. I hope they can look back on their memories of being close to their person in a library, completely distracted by each other.

Love is special. Love of all kinds, even of those people who have long pasted your present. In the past, they live for ever, for ever as a memory and a gift we shared together.