I think in this case the ripest fruit will be the sweetest.

Having to wait to do all the things, that in an average situation I may have not of appreciated it as much.

Such as breast feeding. Some moms opt away from it, everyone can do what they want and feel what is right. For me it was no question that I was going to be the lifeline for our daughter and provide her with the love; meaning food and nutrition that I can offer.

It’s the one way for me to be able to provide to her what I believe is absolutely best for her.

For now I am on the pumping schedule of every 2/3 hours. I’ve gotten in the routine as it’s been 4 days and nights of this. But, as I settled down last night I wondered, what is it going to be like when it’s actually her I’m holding and not this loud and rented hospital breast pump?

What a magical thought that I could do that with her someday in the future.

Having not been thrown into the breastfeeding world after birth, I have to wait to experience it. I have wait to make that connection that I can imagine is like non other.

In time everything will unfold and I will be in that place of having a baby girl that can rely on her mom for the necessities she needs to survive. But for now, I am helping as much as I can from this distance.

I refuse to let her down.

She is our future and as we constantly move forward, I am preparing and getting ready for those moments ahead because I know that sometimes having to wait will make it that much sweeter.

• continuing on the story